Malang, 30 December 2017
I am so sad to know that more and more of my best friends express their hate to homosexuals. They never know how it feels to grow as homosexual, to struggle myself to fit in the society, yet to hear slanders accused to homosexuals. I never chose to be a homosexual. I never know how or why.
Don't they know they have been opressing homosexuals? Heterosexuals should be grateful to grow as heterosexuals. They do not need to "learn" how to be sexually aroused by opposite gender. They have been claiming themselves as superior. They have opressed homosexuals' rights without they realise. When I tell it to them, they are denying as if they know everything.
The only argument they have is based on their religion. But from there, they try to justify every slander they accuse to homosexuals. I have been hiding my homosexuality, trying to "fix" it alone, breaking my heart and others' heart so many times, and hearing every slander they accuse everyday. Now knowing that they hate me, I feel even more disappointed and depressed.
How they have been opressed homosexuals actually makes homosexuals' life even worsen. We live our homosexual life backstreet-ly because people always stigmatise our sexual orientation. It makes our life and love relationship even more complicated, depressed and unhealthy. But it is us to be blamed for the situation resulted.
I am so sad. I wish my friends look back all their hurting words they have been accused to me. I have been their good friends. But why do they hate me just because I am a gay, that I myself never chose to be? I feel so deceived. I feel so rejected. I am super sad and super disappointed. I have been lonely with my condition and now I am getting even lonelier.
